Don’t Shoot Cupid, Yet….


Last week I grabbed my husband’s iPad, went to the Hips & Curves site, and asked him to choose at least three items that aesthetically appealed to him. I explicitly instructed him not to consider what he thinks I like, or what he would like to see me in…but to just choose what he likes.

And this is what he chose.

This innocent exercise resulted in an interesting conversation.

I admit, I was surprised by his selections, because here’s what I thought he’d like.

So, after much giggling, pointing, and eyebrow furrowing here’s what I finally learned: He wants lingerie to be soft and accessible. Soft to the touch – soft stretch lace… and accessible – free access to the good parts without having to fight with snaps or fabric, or removing the garment. Three of the pieces he chose happened to be showcased next to each other in the first lingerie tab, so his selection of these specific items, ultimately, didn’t surprise me since the shopping technique of “the first ones you find that are good enough” is consistent with all of his clothing shopping behavior.

When I admitted many of his selections were not suited to my aesthetic – they had ruffles after all, he said “They have ruffles?”. After all, he chose what appealed to him – easy access to boobs, butt, and crotch…the ruffles apparently weren’t on his radar since they wouldn’t interfere with access.

While I worry about how a lingerie piece will fit, and show my figure at it’s best (while performing magic tricks) he chooses items according to his needs. He assumes I’d look good in specific items because they serve a specific purpose for him – attractive, non-inhibiting wrapping for his favorite toys.

So, if on a special day (which may include Valentine’s Day), your significant other gifts you with a piece of silk or lace that you just can’t figure out – wear it with a smile. Take it off with a grin. After all, you were just extended an invitation.


*A special note about men (and I do mean men) choosing the size of lingerie. Most embark on shopping expeditions without any idea of your usual clothing size, despite having free access to your closet to check tags. They are much more likely to point to a random woman in the store and say “She’s shaped like that but bigger here, smaller there…”. So, I suggest not being offended if the item is two sizes too small or large or totally unsuited for your build. During my retail years, I found women much more size savvy, though usually equally lost when it came to style. Bottom line, clothes gifting is difficult.



1 Comment

  1. What an interesting experiment! Also, I love your comments about men shopping for women. My brother bought me a zebra print belt one year for Christmas that was the perfect size, and I asked how he figured it out. He did the “bigger here, taller, etc.” comparison for a sales woman, and she nailed it!

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